Monday, February 9, 2009

Pulling Up Roots

I want to move. I really do. Unfortunately, I can't move right now. There are a number of the job market, the housing market, too much debt and two of my kids live here....the two that will be starting families of their own soon. Those of you that have moved over and over and over again probably think I'm crazy, however, I grew up about five miles from where we now live. Irv moved out here from Chicago in eighth grade. This area is all we've ever known. It was a awesome place to grow up and a wonderful place to raise kids, but now I want to experience something new. I want the excitement of putting down roots somewhere else. I want a change of scene. I'm ready to pull up the stakes and pitch my tent in another part of the country.

Let's say that three years from now the economy is better, houses are selling and there are jobs available. That would be great, but there would still be one thing that would keep me here, and that would be grandchildren. I am really looking forward to that. I don't want to be a long distance grandma. I want to be hands on. I want my grandchildren to know me, to sit on my lap so I can read to them and sing to them. I can't do that from the other side of the least not on a regular basis.

So, just this morning I asked myself...what is it that's driving me to want to move in the first place? Is it the weather? The view? The house? The fresh start? The adventure of it all?

If I ever moved out of state, I wouldn't be moving to a warmer climate. I would move to Colorado. So it obviously isn't the winters. The view is definitely a plus in Colorado, but it isn't the driving force behind my desire. I don't really care too much about the house. Sure after 36 years in the same little house, it might be fun to have a change of scene, but I love my little house. No, it isn't that. A fresh start? That always sounds like fun, but we really get a fresh start each and every day. Don't we?

The excitement? Yes, I think that might be it....although I honestly feel that it's really a little of all of the above that feeds into the excitement. Don't you think?

If I can't pick up and move to Colorado when the opportunity presents itself because my heart tells me to stay put, what could I do to fill my desire for the excitement a move would bring?

What about moving to a new town in Illinois, or in southern Wisconsin? Would that do it? Would that be enough? I would be moving, but still not leaving the kids and possible grandchildren. It would be the same awful weather and the same basic midwestern view, but it would be a fresh start, a different house and would be exciting!

All I can do right now is to continue to control what I can control and that is clearing up my debt. Then when the time comes, I will take a look at everything else and decide where I would like to continue this wonderful adventure called "life"!! The funny thing is...when I think about pulling out of this driveway for the last time, I tear up.....I assume I would get over that?

Have you moved a lot? Did you leave somewhere you loved? Are you living where you grew up? Are you living where you want to live? Feel free to share...I would love to hear your stories!


Mulchandmore said...

I have moved,two major,one from up-state New York to Michigan UP, second from UP to lower northern Michigan. I dislike moving, both the physical logistics, and leaving the known(friends) for the unknown.
Perhaps a weekend or a week of camping/exploring would help your wanderlust?

Beholden-To-Nature (Kenna) said...

Definitely been the "mover." At the ripe old age of 33, ..32? no, it is 33 (I was going to talk about places I've lived, but now senility seems to be the topic!). JK! Anyway, I've lived in 6 states and 3 other countries (only for a few months each, so depending on your definition of "lived"). I would say there are benefits and downfalls to everything. Moving itself is a huge pain. Moving provides excitement yes, but new roots... wellllll... don't know about roots per sè-- I have a hard time answering the question "Where are you from?" And, I still don't know yet where I want to settle... or if I really will ever settle. Anyway, long answer, but... I guess it's just a matter of your priorities... Which would you regret giving up more? Or... what about one of those websites/programs where you switch houses with someone for a while? Would that allow you the best of both worlds? You might be able to get the excitement by traveling without having to permanently move? Just thoughts...

At any rate, those photos are *gorgeous* so, you're obviously seeing beautiful country. Wishing you Good Luck with your decision when the time comes! :)

Lanyardlady said...

We talk about moving one day. We say our dream is to move closer to the coast and live in a small house with one shade tree, a yard where the dog can run free, and space for a big garden. But do we want a lifestyle change or a change of scenery? I don't think we're sure. Have you ever thought of renting a vacation home in Colorado for a month and seeing what it's like to actually live there?

T.Allen-Mercado said...

I spent the first 30 years of my life in NYC, came to AZ on vacation in September of 2003 and moved here on December 3rd of the same year. Not a friend or family member within 3k miles. Why? Why not? I had as many reasons to stay as I did to leave. Perhaps-well for sure, the reasons to stay were people, but the reasons to go were dreams...people can visit or vice versa...dreams are of the moment.

It's been interesting, this journey-this new autonomy and interdependence within the little microcosm of our family of four. I have experienced and discovered a me who had no room to flourish in the confines of a role in a setting that existed long before I'd "arrived".

I'd do it again, and I will as soon as I promote the last child from the dining room table to university. Destination unknown...

I wish you clarity in your decision making process.


My mother cursed me years ago by stating that I would never live any where but here.
I took the first train out to Arizona, but just ended up driving back and forth. From there moved on up to Colorado!!!..Durango. Beautiful, stunning, spiritual, sunny, tiny main street U.S.A. filled with native Americans and a few Europeans...stuff my dreams are made of. Even then, I managed to fly back and forth, until finally calling Cali "home" as usual.
For the last ten years I have been living walking distance from my childhood home. Damn that She-wolf!


P.S. My humble moving forward advice:
Clean house. Organize everything. Re-structure. Re-arrange. Re-paint. Take every step toward moving out. Some situation may arise that will surprise you. So be ready!

P.S.S. Feng-Shui:
If you want change > change 27 things.

Catherine said...

We moved alot when my husband was active duty military. All over the States, including Colorado and then several years in Europe. We are getting the wanderlust again. Been here 20 years. However, we built this house we love. It`s cheap to live here, northern Arizona, but it`s 140 miles round trip to shop or see a doc.
We decided to keep our home and instead travel and pursue our hobbies. We can have fun and keep the house we love. It is a hard decision to stay or go. Good luck.

Beth Jaffe said...

I grew up a Cleveland "eastsider" and now I'm a "westsider". And boy has that made a world of differnce! The people over here seem different to us and we are so much more at home than we were before! We love the west side, to the dismay of my family who are still "eastsiders!" Maybe a small change like that could do it for you!
O! And we've all got the debt! Ugh!

aliceinparis said...

I haven't moved much. I've traveled a lot but not moved. Maybe you can start scouting out cool little artist towns and places relatively near that you've never been to before with an eye to living there.
Also as Teri Rees Wang said, declutter and clean out and reorganise so if things happen, you are ready. I am sure that just doing that will perk you up.

Cecile/DreamCreateRepeat said...

My husband and I moved to this area right after college with the assumption we'd move several times in our working years. We've been here ever since, but have moved 4 times in the area (the old concentric expanding circles of house moves in the urban/suburban area of DC).

Now that we are semi-retired, we think about moving but like you, the pull of not-yet-existing grandchild keep us in limbo. Oldest child is targeting living in this area....the others: who knows yet.

My hope is to find civilized, like-minded families overseas to trade houses with at some point. I want to experience something much more than a one week vacation to a foreign country, but something significantly less than a move.

Time will tell if I can make that happen. It will take a lot of trust to let strangers move into my home.....

Cathy Winsby said...

I was born and raised on Vancouver Island, BC and had to make a move to Regina, SK.

That's when I realized that I had just left the most wonderful home behind me.

The experience was good for my whole family because it made us appreciate things much more...absence makes the heart grow fonder!

We now live back in BC though in Sicamous and not back 'home' as I will always think of it.

The rest of my family lives back on Vancouver Island and I miss them every day but my children are setting down roots here so this is where I will stay as long as they are here.

CountryDreaming said...

Love of travel? You remind me of Bilbo Baggins, wanting to see mountains. Best thing I've found nowadays to help cure wanderlust is to take a long weekend or week-long trip to a Bed and Breakfast way out in the country, as far away as you feel called and can manage. I tend to somehow choose places where cell phones don't work, and prefer places with no tv in the room. Try to take three or four days at least. If you're anything like me, you'll find two passes way too quickly.

By the way, my "word verification" is very fitting for this topic. It's "oftstabl." Maybe that's in honor of the B&B working farms with horses I like to stay at in places like the Hocking Hills of Ohio or the Smoky Mountains in Tennessee. "Often stables" ... I like it.

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